Dr. Zhivegas performing a Prince tribute show at The Old Rock House, July 13th, 2018.
You know that scene in the movie about the 40-something guy having a midlife crisis where he goes to hear live music and looks really out of place and he’s Paul Rudd? That’s me.
So, I’m at a live music venue for the first time in forever. This white woman puts her hand in the small of my back. I think she’s trying to get by, so I move. She moves with me. Turns out, she thinks the small of my back is where her hand belongs now. So… I grab her by the wrist to move her hand away. She interprets this as me wanting to hold hands with her. So… I put my hand on her hip and push her away from me. She somehow interprets this as me wanting her to take a selfie of the two of us. So… I hold my drink in front of her phone to keep her from taking my picture. Finally, I have to position my girlfriend between myself and this woman, cause a nigga ain’t trying to get locked up. Fuckin’ people! I sweatergawd!
If I end up in jail, chances are, a drunk white girl who thinks she’s cute was involved.
At my age, I only go to nightclubs to remind myself why I never go to nightclubs.
I’m gonna start a Prince cover band that only plays songs off his last five albums. “Play ‘Purple Rain!'” “What? You wanna hear ‘MARZ?’ Again? Well, okay… I guess…”
I’m gonna start a band that plays reggae covers of Pet Shop Boys songs, called “The Head Shop Boys.”
I’m gonna start an acoustic Poison cover band called “Allergen.”
The guitar in “She’s Always in My Hair,” is the same as “Sex Shooter.” It only took me 35 years to notice.
When I was a kid, I really thought Wendy and Lisa were just discussing tea service.
Back when metal bands were being accused of putting backward Satanic messages in their music, Prince was putting backward Christian messages in his. This nigga
Annoying Habit Number 247: When I’m at a concert and the crowd screams for an encore, I just chant, “Attica! Attica!”